CSI Mentoring

I spent some time on Sunday reconnecting with a former classmate and colleague who left Jackson, MS and moved to the west coast about the same time my family left Jackson for the east coast. The recession was not kind to him and after a layoff, some contract work and some other temporary jobs, he landed a position as a manufacturer's rep. He loves the job and has tremendous growth opportunities in that position. 

After talking about common friends, family and other stuff, our discussion turned to CSI. He is familiar with CSI but never saw the need to join because he "wasn't involved in specifications writing." In his current sales position, he sees the need for networking and was interested in learning about CSI and I promised to connect him with the leaders I know in his area. 

I took the conversation a step further. His company is a major player in industrial applications of their materials but are a new player on the side of architectural uses of their materials. I began to sense that while my friend can see a clear growth path ahead for his company, he may need data, metrics and other items to convince his boss of the very necessary expenditures ahead. That sounds to me like a mentoring opportunity for someone in the CSI chapter he should join. 

As an architect, one of the great benefits that I've gained from my involvement in CSI is an understanding and appreciation of what the manufacturer's rep goes through; their every day trials and tribulations. Some of the negative parts of the job are self-inflicted, but others are inflicted by their management or corporate structures. The biggest light bulb lit for me about six years ago when our chapter had a panel discussion on product substitutions. The prodcut reps on that panel all said they hate substitutions because it means they didn't do their job to get in the spec in the first place. That was one of the first times that I realized we are all in this together and should work to help each other rather than be adversarial or simply use each other. 

In the days since my friend and I parted, I've been thinking a lot about that notion of mentoring within the CSI chapter. I am also in the process of resetting my firm's mentoring program for the program year. I gave a presentation at CONSTRUCT in St Louis on mentoring which featured a case study of our firm's program. I touched on some notions of starting a mentoring program in a CSI chapter but, candidly, didn't offer much assistance on that notion. 

What if we used the great manufacturer's reps each chapter has to mentor the next generation of manufacturer's reps? How great could our industry be if each and every rep that entered an architect's or engineer's office or stepped onto a job site held the CCPR certification or at least CDT? How great would CSI be with that sort of involvement? 

Across the last several months, I've been thinking about CSI's position in leadership development and have mentioned to our region leadership the notion of using leadership in CSI to further your careers. That's what I did. I was recently promoted to principal in our firm. I'm not sure I would have earned that promotion if I had not agreed to serve as committee chair, then director, then president of my CSI chapter over 10 years ago. How great could our industry be if all members of the construction team cut their teeth in leadership positions in CSI? 

The challenge that I plan to make to our region leaders and one that I make now to ALL CSI leaders at the chapter and region level is sell two notions about CSI: we will make you better at your current job and we will provide you safe opportunities to hone your leadership skills for your future job. What else can you ask for of a professional organization?

Serving Others

Sunday's mass at our church was offered for my friend, Mark, who passed away in December. I wrote about Mark, his prayer service, funeral and his service to me and to our church here. 

Mark's widow, his daughter, son-in-law, grandson and many friends were at church tonight. This was not announced publicly. In fact, I didn't know the mass was for Mark until I read the Prayer of the Faithful before mass. I was training two young people to be lectors at our mass so we went through the call to worship, the two readings, the Prayer of the Faithful and the announcements. Its fitting that I found out the mass tonight was offered for Mark while I was preparing young people for service in the church.

It also dovetails nicely with some other items from my recent efforts. Last week at CONSTRUCT, I gave a presentation on being a Buddy, Coach and Mentor at work or in our professional organizations. My major theme is that in our work and volunteer activities, we need buddies to make things fun, coaches to help us be better at our current jobs and mentors to help us across our careers. 

I noticed that many of the presentations I attended at CONSTRUCT mentioned mentorship and service to others. In one on developing the next generation of specifiers, the notions of coaching and mentoring specifiers was particularly acute. 

CONSTRUCT also featured the Young Professionals program with I hope grows into an annual event. Chaired by my good friend, Cherise Lakeside, a group of young professionals spent Wednesday learning about various topics and then toured the Hager facility in St Louis. I spent some time Wednesday morning with the group talking about how to network at CONSTRUCT and then in a speed mentoring session. It was a great event and I think the young professionals found it beneficial. 

I've also doing some work thinking and writing about what I enjoy the most about my volunteer activities. In the past, I coached soccer, but now I focus on scouting and working in my church. I'm a member of my son's boy scout troop committee and assist the troop and my other son's cub scout pack in myriad ways. In our parish, I help with confirmation and organizing young people to lector at our 5:30P mass which also features a contemporary music group and progressive message. 

In my work activities, I try to focus on creating the next generation of architects and firm leaders by spending time with our staff making them better at their jobs and helping mentor them for the future that is coming. 

I do a lot of reading about leadership. I follow many people on Twitter who tweet about leadership. These themes of mentorship and service to others are reoccurring in my reading and in my life. I think this is what Mark wanted for me and for all of us: service others, work in your faith, but have a ball doing it! You do that every day and you'll have a rich and rewarding life. 

Manager or Leader: Attitude Decides Which You Are

I'm preparing a presentation for CONSTRUCT in St Louis in September on what it means to be a buddy, a coach and a mentor. I've been thinking about the folks in my career who have been my buddies, my coaches and my mentors and my own roles in the careers of others in the offices where I've worked.

As luck would have it, my friend Cherise Schacter posted a blog a few months ago that dovetails nicely into my thoughts for today. You can read Cherise's The Voices in My Head blog here. In one post, Cherise points out that the top five risks for design firms have not changed in the last 40 years and that part of the reason these risks have not changed is related to each generation's ability to act as coaches and mentors. I think part of this ability is related to attitude.

I've had three jobs in my professional career: all three with architecture firms. My first was with a small firm in Mississippi. It is still owned by the two partners who started the firm in the 1970's. When I joined the firm in 1994 I was too young and too inexperienced to have any thoughts about what I would do daily at work or how I would approach my business. I was glad to be out of school and working!

As time went on, I found myself doing a large number of things: delivering furniture for one partner's wife, going to the State Bureau of Buildings to pick up checks and acting as the firm's IT professional. It was a great job and I learned a tremendous amount, but after five years, I left that firm, moved to Baltimore and went work for a very small office of a much larger, international firm. I made a conscious decision to present myself as strictly a project manager and intentionally set aside the attitude of "team first" as it related to administrative tasks and IT. That dovetailed nicely into that firm's notion of professional versus administrative staff.

After seven  years, the office in Baltimore was closed and I joined Design Collective, where I still work after nearly 10 years. I started work here feeling I had little to prove. I had the confidence of a seasoned design professional and someone who was hired based on my resume and skills but more importantly on the strength of client recommendations. I didn't need to assume a persona of what I wanted to be involved in or not involved in. I came to work, pitched in on some deadlines, and began to build my career with my new firm. Our firm's infrastructure of administrative staff lent itself to that notion.

I bring this up because from time to time I hear people say things like "I can't make friends at the office, I have to maintain a professional relationship." This generally seems to be said by people who are new to the firm where they are currently working or perhaps newly promoted. They seem to be saying I have to present myself differently at this firm than I did at the firm I just left, or now that I'm at a different managerial level, I have to completely change my behavior. 

I started at Design Collective as what we call Architect Level 3 (A3): I was licensed and had a little over 10 years of experience. I was quickly promoted to Associate and then Senior Associate. I now co-lead one of our four architecture studios and am growing into the role of an educational practice leader. When I was just an A3, I had a great many friends in the firm and I still have some of them because they were the other A3's with the same level of experience as me and we were promoted together. 

But I have some other friends who are not Associates or Senior Associates. The line between buddy, coach and mentor can be a fine one but it also doesn't have to be rigidly defined, unless corporate policy or culture dictates that it must. In our firm, it does not have to be defined. Social media has helped blur the lines, so I always recommend caution. Those who know me, know I'm out in the public realm in social media. Look for @mpkemp on Twitter, but I'm also on Facebook, LinkedIn and Instagram. I'm also on a niche-SoMe app called Untappd which is related to craft beers. I'm pretty much wide open on Twitter, so several colleagues at work follow me. LinkedIn is the same: if I know you, I'll connect with you. I'm a bit more guarded on Facebook and Instagram, but that's just me.

As a leader in a firm, I think you can maintain friendly relationships with your colleagues as long as both parties understand the hierarchy and respect each other's position. I had some bumps and bruises in my early SoMe days, but I think I've overcome those. I am also not the type of leader that is "my way or the highway." If that's your management style, then you probably cannot maintain friendly relationships with your colleagues, especially on SoMe. You probably need the rigid order of hierarchy in order to feel safe and be successful. 

My attitude is that I spend 40+ hours per week with my colleagues and I like to have a good time with them. We joke with each other and sometimes play pranks on each other. But at the end of the day, we work hard and enjoy and respect each other. I think our work environment displays this idea as does the high quality work we do and our repeat clients. 

To those who say, "I have to maintain a professional relationship," I say you are misguided and missing the forest for the trees. If you cannot supervise people and maintain a friendly rapport with them outside of work, there is one of two issues. Either you have the wrong attitude or you have the wrong people working with you. I've seen both and it can be difficult to navigate, especially for new leaders. There is a subtle nuance between leader and manager. If you are unable to see the bigger picture of your interpersonal relationships, you are probably destined to be a manager. You will schedule, criticize, acknowledge and manage the work, but you will not move your organization forward in any meaningful way. 

You may be good at managing, but even the best manager cannot be a leader. As Jim Collins said, "Good is enemy of Great." Great managers begin to branch over to become leaders. Leaders have vision and can see the forest and the trees. Leaders strategize in the big picture, but never lose sight of the individuals that make that big picture real. One of my best friends is a great manager but a very mediocre leader. Its a matter of perspective and attitude. I want to be a great leader, so being a good manager is my enemy. 

Why Volunteer?

 

For those who have been following "The Accidental Leader" from the start, the story of my rise to leadership in the Baltimore Chapter of CSI was pretty well by accident. If you scroll back to 2006 in the archives on the right hand bar, you can read what happened.

As I worked my way through being 1st Vice-president and then Chapter President in 2006 through 2008, I made a great number of acquaintances and friends both regionally and nationally through CSI. I found that many folks in leadership roles were watching what me and others in Baltimore were doing, particularly as it related to us hosting the CSI National Convention in June 2007. One of those was Walt Marlowe, our former Executive Director and CEO. In the spring of 2008, Walt called and asked me to join the Strategic Planning Update Task Team (SPUTT). After learning more, I eagerly agreed to join the team.

What I found across FY2009 has led me to seek more leadership involvement in CSI. SPUTT held monthly conference calls and two face-to-face weekend meetings. I got to travel a bit and met some of the smartest and most thoughtful people I have ever known. Many of them are still my closest friends. Vivian and I continue to stay in touch while working together and with others to organize the Run CSI events at CONSTRUCT. When there was recent civil unrest in Baltimore, Mike reached out to make sure my family and I were safe. In a very short time, I made some life-long friends because of my work on SPUTT.

We also made a difference in CSI for the next five years and beyond. It was hard work, but it was and continues to be immensely rewarding. This past spring, I ran for Institute Director from the Middle Atlantic Region. Part of my elections page bio was to describe how I would contribute to the mission, values and goals of CSI. Having help craft that document, I could see very clearly how I could help. I was incredibly proud to state in my bio that I had helped create the mission, values and goals statements of CSI!

As the work of SPUTT came to an end in the spring of 2009, I asked the Institute President-elect where I could help during his presidency. He said, "wherever I wanted to help." I chose the Awards Committee. I had been involved in our chapter awards for some time and that seemed like a great place to start. I must confess, I had some trepidation that I would volunteer for a higher profile committee like Technical or Education and get turned down. Awards seemed safe.

During FY2010, I got to know several people on the committee, even though we did not have a face-to-face meeting, only conference calls. I found the committee work to be exhilarating and incredibly challenging. That challenge increased in FY2011 when we completely re-wrote the Honors and Awards Program, almost from scratch. Two of my closed friends were on that committee. One of the great thrills in my CSI career was to write a letter of endorsement for my friend Jonny's Fellowship Nomination and then be in the room when she was elevated to Fellowship!

After three years under Jonny's able leadership, she stepped aside as Awards Committee Chair and I assumed that role. I'm ending my third year as Awards Committee Chair and am moving on to my next role. In six years on the Awards Committee, I have interacted with many people, both on the committee and not, and have found the entire experience to be immensely rewarding.

CSI is looking for smart, hardworking volunteers for committee roles. If you're reading this, you fit that bill! I don't write that flippantly: if you found this blog and are taking the time to read it, you are the type of volunteer CSI needs. You care about CSI and the construction industry. We need folks to be on the Education Committee, the Jury of Fellows, the Technical Committee and the Specifier Editorial Advisory Board. You can learn more by clicking here: https://portal.csinet.org/Committees/Volunteer/Form.aspx?uid=ef098b63-d4ae-41ec-b432-c081e425e8bb

 

I strongly urge you to consider volunteering for committee work. The deadline for volunteering is Friday, May 22, 2015. You will meet some of the smartest and most hardworking people in our industry. You will perform some of the most important and gratifying work that you can imagine. If you have any questions, please contact me through this blog or at mkemp@designcollective.com CSI needs you and you can make a difference!

Leading Meetings

 

I spent this past weekend with my son at a scouting event for scouts and scouters from across Central Maryland which included a large meeting that was run by a youth leader of probably 18 or 19 years of age. As I drove home, I realized that what I had witnessed was similar to many meetings that I have attended with the "same as it always has been" agenda and too many opportunities for too many people to speak. My son described the meeting as "boring" and he is right. However, age and maturity helped me see through the boring repetition and glean out the important information that was imparted. 

 

My son and I discussed a couple of things as we drove home from camp. I asked him what made the meeting boring. He said basically it was too long and too many people talk too much. I told him that I know many adults who don't know how to put together an agenda and lead a meeting so I didn't expect this 18 year old young man to be able to do it. I do, however, expect an adult to help teach him.

I've witnessed many types of youth leadership education because of my two oldest children being involved in them. I've also attended many leadership opportunities for myself as an adult. Very few of the opportunities that  I've attended and I don't think any of the youth ones I've encountered broach the subject of being a presiding officer at a meeting. 

 

I'm an architect by education and licensure. I'm a project manager by definition of my firm. I have the opportunity to lead people in both my profession and in my volunteer activities. All of those titles and opportunities have something in common: I lead many meetings and attend many meetings: design meetings that I prepare and chair, OAC meetings that I actively participate in but do not chair, scheduling and management meetings inside our office, board meetings, committees meetings, way too many meetings!

There is a common thread through all of these meetings: when the presiding officer or leader is prepared and executes a well thought out agenda, the meeting tends to flow better and be more efficient. When the meeting is not planned or poorly thought out, boredom may ensue. I have some thoughts about how to plan and execute a meeting that are beneficial to all involved in meetings. 

 

1. Understand the Purpose of the Meeting

 

Meetings can have many different purposes. Some are presentational in nature: we present our design work to our clients and they offer feedback. The agenda for these meetings are fairly straightforward as is the discussion and flow of the meeting. The minutes are straightforward and easy to prepare. Other meetings, such as Owner-Architect-Contractor meetings, are held on a regular basis for a finite duration and with a set agenda. Here, too, the minutes are easy to prepare. 

 

Other meetings are to discuss problems or issues. On a large project that I'm involved in, we have many meetings to review submittal comments or RFI responses as our client takes a heavy hand in reviewing submittals and RFI responses. These meetings are either face to face, via conference call or some combination of the two. There typically is not an agenda but the meeting involves a review of the submittal comments or RFI responses so that sets the flow of the conversation. Board meetings are held with less frequency tend to follow a typical agenda of allowing committees to report, chapters or other groups to report, review of old business and allowance for discussion of new business.

Regardless of the purpose of the meeting, all attendees should understand the purpose and be prepared to participate in the meeting efficiently. Communication is the key to understanding the purpose and how to be prepared. That communication best occurs through the meeting agenda. 

 

 

2. Prepare an Agenda

 

An agenda helps set the tone and duration of a meeting. It helps set expectations for the business that will be covered in the meeting. It also helps attendees come to the meeting prepared for the discussions and better able to make decisions and be efficient in the conversations. 

 

The agenda should be more than a review of the minutes of the previous meeting. OAC meetings tend to be nothing more than review of the last meeting's minutes along with time allowed for new business. The trouble here is duration and preparation. It is easy to prepare for items that remained open from the previous meeting: all you have to do is review the minutes and be prepared to discuss the items that require your participation. However, the duration of these meetings are left wide open so any attendee can take control of the meeting by trying to discuss open items for a much longer duration than necessary or because of the attendee group. Also, leaving the forum wide open for any new "business" furthers the opportunity for one attendee to hijack the meeting.

 

A coherent and efficient agenda lists the open items that require discussion, perhaps with some notation of how to reach a conclusion to the item, along with a duration of discussion allowed. For example, I chair my church's Mission and Planning Council and therefore preside over our monthly meetings. Our agenda opens with approval of the previous meeting's minutes, a review of committee business and then discussion of open items from the last meeting. I allow limited time for each item and then expect the discussion to move on. The time limit is noted on the agenda which allows us to end after an hour or at least minimize our time because of this efficiency. 

 

In order for the agenda to be most effective, it should be prepared and sent out well in advance of the meeting. This is especially critical when the meetings occur infrequently or have a varying agenda. Our Mission and Planning Council meets monthly, so the distribution of the agenda allows for members to be reminded that the meeting is forthcoming. Our design meetings typically have varying agendas depending on phase of design and the issues that have been raised on the project. While these meetings may occur biweekly, sending that agenda out early is critical to ensure that all are prepared for each meeting.

 

 

3.  Arrive Early

 

Early arrival allows the meeting to start on time. Presiders who respect the time of all attendees will receive more respect for their time and their ideas. Make sure the room is set up and has enough chairs. Pass out copies of any materials before the meeting starts by leaving in front  of seats anticipated to be filled. Have the sign in sheet ready and make sure everyone signs in. 

 

For recurring meetings, I use an Excel spreadsheet that already contains the regular attendees names so all they have to do is initial or place a check mark next to their name. This saves time and makes the attendees feel like they are welcomed and are special. 

 

 

4.  Work the Agenda

During the meeting, follow the agenda. There is nothing more frustrating to me than a meeting that doesn't have a clear leader. When the meeting lacks a leader, it is a free-for-all that tends to revolve around ego and who wants to be heard the most. As the presiding officer or leader of the meeting, you should constantly endeavor to keep the meeting flowing along the agenda. You don't have to cut off important conversation at the times noted on the agenda, but recognize when the discussion needs to move on. There is nothing worse than uncomfortable silence or long-winded story tellers to drive all participants to check their phones and therefore check out of the meeting. 

However, there are times when even the best meeting leaders fail. I had a client once whose culture revolved around the loudest in the room got his way. Meetings with this client were incredibly inefficient and at times painful. 

 

5.  Take Accurate Notes

Part of the duty of the meeting leader is to ensure that accurate minutes are distributed in a timely manner. It is difficult to run the meeting and take good notes. I worked with a GC once who brought his admin assistant to the meeting to take notes for him. That worked well but is an expense that not all firms or contracts can bear. 

I tend to use my iPad because I can type faster than I can write. When I do write, I have a short-hand that I've developed which helps with speed. I've also noted that with most meeting attendees, brief pauses to allow for note taking are not an issue, especially if they lead to good minutes follow the meeting. 

Part of accurate meeting notes is getting the attendees accurately recorded. I touched on the sign-in sheet earlier. I usually take my own notes of attendees on my meeting notes to ensure that I have an accurate record.

 

6.  Distribute the Minutes Quickly

Any OAC meeting whose agenda tends to be a review of the previous meeting's minutes probably has those minutes distributed the evening before the next meeting. I feel it is incredibly disrespectful to all involved to not distribute the minutes earlier. I have a 5 business day rule for myself and I almost always hit it. I know we all get busy with other projects and other business on the project that the meeting is about but its difficult to prepare for the next meeting without the reminder of what happened last time. 

Minutes also form an incredibly important part of the project record. We tend to work on large projects which mean thousands of decisions, dozens of meetings and very long design and construction durations. Its hard to remember why we didn't put natural gas in chemical fume hoods three years after the decision was made. Meeting minutes help with everyone's memory, especially those who have selective memory!

 

 

 

7.  Constantly Evaluate Recurring Meetings

Consider the purpose, duration, location, invitees and every facet of the meeting regularly. When I start a design project, I schedule out every meeting for the entire design duration. Recurring meetings work best when they are regularly scheduled, on the same date and time and in the same location. People get used to attending every other Tuesday at 8:30A and you are able to get better attendance and better preparation. 

When I took over as chair of my parish Mission and Planning Council, I knew I had to change the culture of the meetings. Committee business was occupying way too much time. Agenda items were included that didn't have a purpose. The meetings were boring and took way too long. While not perfect, we've addressed most of these concerns. 

Evaluating attendees is probably the hardest part. Many of our clients tend to invite the entire project team and sometimes that is not appropriate. I also have CM's who like to say "the architect isn't really needed in this meeting." Both of those are problematic for different reasons. If you have attendees who don't say a word for several meetings in a row and don't seem to be participating in any of the business covered in the meeting, excusing them from attendance might be in order. Conversely, if you constantly hear "we need so-and-so to make that decision" maybe so-and-so should be invited to attend. If decisions are made and then reversed by someone not in attendance, like the architect in the my comment above, then perhaps that person should be invited.

 

 

 

Meetings are a necessary to many businesses, but especially in construction. Even the smallest project has an owner, A/E team and builder who need to collaborate and communicate regularly. Meetings are essential to that level of communication and collaboration. Hopefully, you can work these seven points into your management of your projects and make your meetings shorter and more efficient.

Moment App and my iPhone Usage

I mentioned in my How Are You Doing post that I might get involved in a study the first week of February that, in part, uses Moment app. The study is through National Public Radio's "All Tech Considered" and their station in NYC, WNYC. I decided to do it. I started with Moment app on Saturday, January 17 and I used it for about four weeks. It was an up and down process, but I've learned some things about myself in the process.

First, it took me a few days to get in tune with using the app. Moment app is only available for the iPhone and the iOS operating system. Sorry, Android users! The purpose of Moment app is to record your time spent on your phone and report that usage to you. It uses several different items to gauge your screen time. Currently, iOS doesn't have an easy way to allow an app to determine if you're on the phone or not. It seems simple to me: if the screen is illuminated, you're on the phone. I'm not an IT person, so it must be more complicated than that!

Moment takes multiple factors into consideration when determining when you're on your phone or not. The one I quickly discovered was the detection algorithm in determining your location. The first day I downloaded it and started using it, I took my kids about 35 miles north of our house for lunch. Moment thought I was on the phone the whole trip up and back. Between that and some other side trips around town, about 60 to 70 minutes of screen time became 167 minutes! 

I had seen stories where the folks at WNYC were shocked to see their phone usage was approaching 2 hours a day and here I was nearly 1-1/2 times that! I read through the FAQ's that come with the app and didn't see a solution. I decided to email the developer, Kevin Holesh. His email is listed under "Need more help?" at the bottom of the FAQ section. To my surprise, he got back to me within about 2 hours of sending the email. To account for movement such as mine and to overcome the detection algorithm, there are two phone positions that Moment app ignores: face down flat on a surface and upside down, face to your leg in your front pants pocket. 

Once I got that figured out, I found my battery draining, so back to the FAQ's! I did everything Kevin suggested but still find my battery life draining more quickly. Moment has to run in the background in order to track your screen time. I'm also a bit more active than maybe some of the folks in the larger cities are that use the app. I walk my dog for about a mile each morning and then drive 8 miles to work. If I'm in my office, I usually keep my phone face down on my desk. However, I have projects that I working on at Johns Hopkins University, University of Maryland Baltimore and University of Maryland College Park. I also take my kids many places, attend conferences and generally move about in a 35 to 40 mile radius of my home. I suspect Kevin and others who use his app in NYC move about in a 3-5 mile radius regularly. 

Another thing I learned about myself, which I mostly knew, is that my phone usage during the day is 1.) tied to what I'm doing that day and 2.) can be shorter during working hours than before and after work. An example of 1.) is Tuesday, January 19 and Tuesday, February 2. I was at a construction field office, mostly in meetings, and used my phone very little those days. The field office has wifi and so my iPad sees high usage for meeting minutes and checking email. But on Thursday, January 22 and Friday, January 23, I was at a conference in DC and was on my phone constantly. I took the Metro downtown both days so I was listening to podcasts and playing games in route. 

Part of the WNYC study I was involved in gets to 2.). Some scientists think that American adults are unable to be bored because we are constantly on our phones. Moment has a graphing feature that shows you what times of day you spent how many minutes on your phone. For this post, I selected a random week day: Wednesday, January 21. I spent 63 total minutes on my phone and picked it up 70 times that day. Between 7:37 and 7:45 AM, I was on it for 5 minutes with 12 pick ups. Sadly, much of that was while I was driving to work, so I was clearly playing games or checking Twitter while at stop lights. For the next 9 hours, I spent 39 minutes on the phone for a few minutes at a time. That includes what I think is my commute home, which means I probably didn't have the phone face down in my car, so it was recording the 8 mile trip home as usage. Then, between 7:48 PM and 8:26 PM, I spent another 14 minutes on my phone with 25 pick ups.

That was a good day. I'm seeing the trend that my phone usage skyrockets on the weekends. I used Moment on three weekends and had this usage:

Saturday, January 17 - 167 minutes 

Sunday, January  18 - 118 minutes

Saturday, January 24 - 65 minutes

Sunday, January 25 - 82 minutes

Saturday, January 31 - 63 minutes

Sunday, February 1 - 111 minutes

You could easily discount the first two days as those were the first two days I had the app. The next weekend as I was on retreat with the Confirmation class from my church so I wasn't using my phone much. The last weekend might be representative, but I'm not sure as I got bored during the Super Bowl and was intermittently playing games and keeping an eye on Twitter during much of the game. 

 

All told, I think my phone usage mirrors my life - all over the map! I did stop using Moment app because of the battery usage issues. I am towards the end of my wireless contract so my iPhone 5C is approaching the magic 2 year age, but I think the app sucks more juice than intended.

I enjoyed this experiment and I think the simple act of tracing my phone usage has helped me understand it and do something about it. While I'm cooking dinner, do I play fewer solitaire hands, no. But I am keeping the phone face down on my desk more often, leaving it there when I go to the bathroom  or to get a cup of coffee and I'm usually not touching it during meetings. I think those are positive moves. 

How's your phone usage?

Email: Scourge of Humanity or Business Essential?

My company's email has been down since sometime Tuesday evening. I'm typing this Thursday morning, so its been 30 hours or more without business email. Apparently, we don't keep our inboxes cleaned out, we filled up three servers and one of them finally crashed and completely shut down our system. Our IT folks are trying to migrate some of the email over to new servers, but anything that was sent to me since Tuesday night is lost. This morning, there's a workaround using our spam filter, which is helpful, but not ideal.

The first few hours of yesterday were nice. I set out a schedule for my morning and was able to follow it without interruption. By lunch time though, I began to worry about what I'm missing. Among other things, I have a 430,000 GSF, $220M project under construction. The team is large and the emails fly, so I was sure I was missing things. By 2:00P, consultants and clients were calling saying my email was bouncing back to them. By 5:30P, the situation seemed ludicrous. By this morning, it is untenable, even with the work around. I'm uncertain that I'm seeing everything plus I have to manually type in email addresses to send through the spam filter, so mistakes are frequent.

We rely too much on email. Sure, its an easy way to make declarative statements and send those statements out to many people on the project team. It generally leaves a trail that can be filed and searched. However, there are too many variables, too many different systems, too many ways for it to fail. It is simply not a reliable way to communicate. If you need to have a discussion that is truly a two-way street, that cannot be adequately accomplished through email.

Now, the ludicrous and untenable situation is reaching a hilarious point. I actually received this email today:

Marvin,

I keep getting error messages about this email. Did you receive it before?

Thanks,  

Yes, this came from a 20-something member of the large project team. I'm off-site this morning but I just checked my voicemail and there was no voicemail from this person; they emailed rather than picking up the phone and calling. This is where the "scourge of humanity" comes in: if you're getting email bounced back, why would you send an email asking if I received the bounced back email? Why wouldn't you pick up the phone and call me?

I gave a presentation last summer at CONSTRUCT 2014 and the CSI National Convention on collaboration. The one line that resonated most with those in the room was "Communicate More, Email Less." More people came up to me and mentioned that line and how much they wish everyone felt the same way. Yesterday and I today I have had great phone conversations and face to face discussions, all without email. Perhaps we should all go without email for a few days and remember what it used to be like.

Another Accidental Leadership Opportunity

These opportunities seem to be coming more and more often lately! With the passing of our dear friend Mark, our parish had a hole in their Confirmation preparation program that needed to be filled. My wife has been a catechist in the program for several years and my daughter a peer mentor since her own Confirmation in 2011. This year, our middle son is going through confirmation preparation. 

When Mark passed, I realized that not only could we not let my own son down, we couldn't let the other 35 kids from our parish down. When I say "we" I mean the parents of the confirmandi. Our parish is blessed to have a great Youth Minister, but Confirmation preparation did not strictly fall under her job description as Mark was the leader of the process, the organizer and to an extent the soul of it. Our Youth Minister helped out greatly, but it was Mark's gig and now we had a hole. 

 

Historically, the mid-point in the Confirmation process is a an overnight retreat at the Archidiocese's retreat house near our home. This retreat was scheduled at the beginning of the year and would occur less than one month after Mark's death. Our parish had no option but to have the retreat go on as planned. While attending the reception following the funeral, I let the Youth Minister know that I was available to help in whatever way she needed. My wife and son would there, so why not? Well, here I am, at the Msgr O'Dwyer Retreat House in Sparks, MD, blogging about my experience at the retreat while the confirmandi complete a silent reflection activity.

I never wanted this blog to be strickly about my CSI activities, but I also do not intend it to be about my faith or religious experiences. However, as the title boldly states, I am and continue to be an accidental leader, whether in business, in CSI or in my own faith journey and the journies of my children and parish community. I simply could not stand by and either let our Youth Minister and my wife take on this monumental task with limited help or let the retreat die altogether. I didn't fully appreciate what I was getting into but I did go in with open eyes. 

I was given limited tasks and was primarily responsible, with another father, to keep an eye on the young men after bed. The dormitory at our retreat house has two stories, so the young women are upstairs and the young men downstairs. By bed time, most were exhausted and went right to bed. There were only two that caused any issue and those issues were minor. I also played photographer as that was one of the things Mark handled. In about 24 hours, I took nearly 300 digital images and probably should have taken more!

 

 

I had a great time interacting with the confirmandi but also with the peer mentors and the other parents who pitched in to help out. All told, we had 39 confirmandi, 9 peer mentors and 9 adults on the retreat. I am a new Catholic. I went through the Rite of Christian Initiation for Adults (RCIA) in 2003-2004 and was baptized and Confirmed at the Easter Vigil on April 10, 2004. I make no secret of this and was surprised when one of the male peer mentors began asking about that experience and others along my faith journey. By Sunday evening, I realized that this young man very much sees me as a mentor. That's one of the great things that came out of the weekend.

One of the not so great things relates to my position as Chair of our parish Mission and Planning Council. I was elected to the Council in May 2013. I served through the 2013-2014 year and watched a Council that lacked direction and leadership. In June 2014, I was nominated to Chair the Council and won a contested election in July. Our parish staff is interested in a strategic planning effort that they have named "Invite - Transform - Act." While the name is good, they are short on direction and action and are looking to our Council for both. In January 2015, I'm empty. For the first time in my leadership life, I cannot see the end goal or the path in front of me to help our Council reach the goal.

I said as much last night at our meeting. I told the Council that I'm empty and I need their help. I didn't get much last night, but that's okay. I've been a leader long enough to realize that inspiration comes at strange times and in strange places. I suspect sometime before our February meeting, I'll get some thoughtful emails or during our February meeting, a course will come out. It might even come from me. 

 

How Are You Doing?

In my blog Quietly Leading, I mentioned a couple of things that I was planning to do during 2015 to be a better leader but more importantly a better husband, father and person. From that blog, I noted that I don't do New Year's Resolutions, but:

"I'm going to try to be a better leader and mentor in 2015. I'm going to try to listen more and be distracted less. I'm going to try to leave my phone in my pocket when in meetings and engaged in conversations. I'm going to try to be more present with my team at work, my committee with CSI, the Mission and Planning Council at church, my sons' boy scout troop and cub scout pack and most importantly with our family. I think if I can all do these things, I'll be a better leader, better mentor and much better husband and father."

The truth is I'm struggling. I think I'm addicted to my iPhone. I started off ok and was able to leave the phone alone and concentrate on the people in front of me. But as days go on, I find myself going back to using it as a crutch to fill the down time. I find myself thinking about the unread email when I should be focusing on other tasks or while in meetings. I heard a spot on NPR's "All Tech Considered" about that crutch notion. Some experts believe that adults are no longer able to be bored because of their smartphones. By not being bored, these experts contend, we are being less creative. NPR's station WNYC and their "New Tech City" segment are doing a "study" using an app called "Moment" that tracks how many times a day you check your phone and will report the results to you. You can look it up on the WNYC NTC web site. I'm thinking about downloading the app and joining in the study. If I do so, I'll probably blog about it here. 

The couple of things I struggle with the most are related to the instant access to the Internet and my Type A personality. I've grown accustomed to being able to Google whenever and wherever I want or need an answer. Just today, my wife and I were out in the country and passed a children's home. Neither of us were familiar with it, so she Googled it on her iPhone to see what group of children it serves. Same for conversations about movies or songs. IMDb and other apps are easy ways to answer questions like "what else has the kid from 'Love Actually' been in?" The answer is he's the voice of Ferb from the "Phineas and Ferb" cartoon on Disney Channel. 

As for my Type A personality, I am focused on many different projects at work. Not just design projects with clients but also the hiring process, studio management and education marketing. Those emails I mentioned earlier come in at all hours because guess what? Most other leaders of our firm are busy, Type A's like me and we think of things and shoot off emails at all hours from out smartphones. Beyond work, I'm also active in my son's boy scout troop and my other son's cub scout pack. Throw in my CSI activities and the Mission and Planning Board at church and I'm constantly receiving email from all sides. It is incredibly difficult to put the phone or iPad away. 

How are you doing on your New Year's Resolutions or attempts to do things better in 2015? I know it can be tough by mid-January, I'm proof of that. I took two weeks off over Christmas and New Year's and hit the ground running on January 5th! But now, by January 17th, I've had a couple of meetings that I wish I could take back. I've had a couple of conversations where I was less than attentive. I took Friday off and realized I neglected to tell my fellow studio leaders I would miss our Friday meeting.

But, I'll hit the ground again on Monday, January 19th ready to go. I'm going to make this happen. I'm going to be more attentive and a better leader in 2015. I think that's why New Year's Resolutions often fail: it is hard to change your ways. If you expect an overnight change, like quitting smoking cold turkey, you will most likely fail. Like the glacier in the below photo, change is slow.

Whatever your resolutions are, keep working on them. By February, you should be a little better. By March, April, May, you should be a little better. Big changes can take a lot of time to implement. Stick with it; make it happen.

Quietly Leading

Today is one of those gross, winter days in Maryland where it is 35 degrees F and raining. The chill cuts all the way through you, especially when you're attending the funeral of a good friend. My friend Mark passed away suddenly on Monday from an aneurysm. He was 60 years old and leaves behind a loving wife, wonderful daughter, son-in-law, mother, brothers and nieces and nephews. I'll miss him immensely, as will many, many others.

Seems a strange way to start a blog on leadership, but there is a point. My family and I attended his wake and memorial prayer service at our home parish last night and his funeral today at his home parish. Mark's wife is the Pastoral Life Director at our church and for much of the last decade he worked extensively with the young people of our parish preparing them for confirmation. Speaker after speaker last night and today, even our own Archbishop, spoke of Mark's quite and peaceful nature and his creativity and unwavering service to the Catholic Church but more importantly to the youth of our church. That is most evident by the large number of teary eyed youth that were in attendance at the prayer service and funeral.

But beyond his obvious service to youth and the numerous local and national awards Mark won while doing that service, another notion was mentioned by many: Mark was always present and engaged. If you were with him, he was with you, no distractions, no random thoughts; he was engaged in your conversation. Mark looked you in the eye, listened to your words, watched your non-verbal language and heard both. I remember a conversation we were having three or four years ago and I guess I mentioned my daughter and some boy she was involved with at the time. My daughter was probably 14 at the time and his daughter was 24 or 25. Mark spoke of some of the boys that his daughter had brought home and how he embraced them until the relationship ended. Her current boyfriend at that time, now her husband, Mark recognized was different and he spoke of the joy he had of watching their love blossom. He didn't say it overtly, but I now realize he was helping me prepare for what I'm seeing now that my daughter is in college and is having more serious relationships. Mark wanted me to know, without saying it bluntly, that I was raising an intelligent and caring young woman who would make the right decisions in her relationships.

I never thought of Mark in terms of mentoring to me. My wife has helped with the confirmation classes for five or six years and I think she would agree that he mentored her. Reflecting on times when I spoke with Mark, I think he was mentoring me while also leading me to make good decisions about my family and my faith. I'm sure many, many others had the same experiences with Mark that I had. Maybe that's the most important leader of all: the quiet, unimposing leader.

I don't normally do "New Year's Resolutions." I typically try to take some time off at the holidays and reflect on what went well last year and how I can make next year better. But in listening and reflecting on what I've heard said about Mark, I'm going to try to be a better leader and mentor in 2015. I'm going to try to listen more and be distracted less. I'm going to try to leave my phone in my pocket when in meetings and engaged in conversations. I'm going to try to be more present with my team at work, my committee with CSI, the Mission and Planning Council at church, my sons' boy scout troop and cub scout pack and most importantly with our family. I think if I can all do these things, I'll be a better leader, better mentor and much better husband and father.